Friday, March 31, 2017

Where Did March Go?

This is for people who have been worried or who have been pretending to be worried how I’ve been feeling. My nausea has finally subsided for the most part. Except I get extremely bad acid reflux every night which makes me feel nauseous because I feel like I’m constantly in the middle of throwing up. Luckily, it’s not bad enough that I can’t fall asleep, so maybe I just need to go to bed earlier before it even starts. I’ve been getting awful headaches that I’ve been somewhat able to manage by eating and drinking more consistently. And I even got my doctor to prescribe me neck massages from Billy! One of the things I love the most about Billy is that his hands don’t ever get tired from massages. I’m not even trying to be dirty by saying that. I pride myself on giving pretty good back and neck rubs, but they still get tired pretty easily. Billy could rub my neck for hours and it makes me love him so much more.

I still haven’t reached the phase where I’m hungry and can’t ever get full. That is one of the things I’ve been looking forward to the most in pregnancy. I would love to just eat nonstop. I usually have to force myself to eat just so I don’t get headaches. And I don’t really enjoy the food unless it’s hummus and garlic naan. Very weirdly specific, I know. People keep asking if we’ve eaten at all these awesome places in Chicago, but I’m scared to try new places for fear that I’ll hate them simply because I’m pregnant. I don’t want to ruin these awesome places with my palette similar to that of a toddler’s!

I’m getting quite anxious to have my belly button pop out. I never thought I would say that either. But right now, my belly button sort of just folds in on itself and looks like a belly roll—which makes it look like I’m just fat, not pregnant. I’ve also been having pain in my tailbone whenever I walk—which is fun for living in the city. I think I need to get back into yoga. I thought this stuff wasn’t supposed to happen until I was much larger! I have been able to go to the gym and lift weights and power-walk until my tailbone started hurting. I can’t run at all because my boobs hurt too much when they bounce and my injection spots on my bum from all the shots still hurt pretty badly when I run. I feel like they should have been healed by now, so it’s probably the baby’s fault. As is everything else. If I didn’t love this little shit so much already, I might be pretty angry at him when he finally gets here. He’s getting guilt trips for life. ;)

We found out we are having a boy on March 23. I finally convinced Billy to go to a private ultrasound place where you just pay $50 to find out the gender—I’ve been begging for him to go since I was 14 weeks. Our ultrasound at the hospital wasn’t scheduled for a few more weeks, so he got as impatient as I’ve been. The place was a little creepy, but they had the equipment, so I guess that’s all that matters. It took forever to find out. At first, little guy was spread eagle for the camera, but the cord was going right between his legs so we couldn’t get a good view. Then, the ultrasound tech made me do some twerking to get him to move and the cord moved, but he stuck his foot right into his groin, so we couldn’t see anything. Then after twerking some more, he had put his foot down but turned all the way around so we couldn’t see anything. The tech thought she knew what it was the whole time, but she wanted to make sure before she told us. But she called him a “He”, so I knew that’s what she thought it was. Then we finally got confirmation and a little picture. I was shocked, because I had felt like it was a girl. I’ve been calling him “she” for the past few weeks. Poor guy. I started crying when we found out, so Billy thinks that I was upset it’s not a girl, but I would have cried no matter what she said. I cried during the new Fast and the Furious trailer, for hell’s sake! Obviously I’m going to cry at that special moment. It just makes it so much more real now that I can picture my little baby as a toddler and in elementary school and high school (YIKES). We also got a 3D ultrasound since it was only $10 more. I’ll spare you the pictures, because it is freaking creepy. I’d recommend waiting until later in pregnancy to get one of those done. He is so scrawny still.

We had friends and family come visit over the weekend and it was the best! Billy is doing an ophthalmology surgery rotation and his hours are ridiculously nice, so he actually got to hang out with all of us. He usually gets a 3-4 day weekend. So, on Friday, it got up to 82 degrees and Billy’s brother was staying with us, so we went to explore the Lincoln Park Zoo. We were so hot and sweaty, it was delightful! I forgot what it was like to be hot and looking for air conditioned buildings. This is the first winter in maybe forever where I haven’t gone somewhere warm on a trip. We had to miss our Cabo trip because of the little life-sucker growing inside me. I didn’t realize how much I needed a tropical vacation for my mental health. Anyway, the Lincoln Park Zoo is pretty awesome, considering it’s free. I mean, it’s no San Diego Zoo, but we still enjoyed it. There were people jogging the trails because it is literally a park. It made me wish we had a little toddler already so we could just go on a stroll through the zoo.

            My best friends from high school were also in town to see Hamilton (and me, of course), so we had the best time being tourists and eating everything we could find. They also spoiled our baby with his first shopping spree from the Magnificent Mile. He’s gonna be such a little stud. Although, I will admit that baby boys get kinda ripped off with their fashion selection. Does anybody have any recommendations for places to shop for baby boys? Toddler boys have a great selection, but baby boys’ stuff is so limited! And I seriously HATE the onesies that say “Daddy’s Little Sidekick” and “More Milk!” and “Slugger” or whatever. I don’t know why, but they make me angry for some reason. Although, I did contemplate getting him one that says “Pants Optional”. I feel like I could design baby boy’s clothing to be way cuter than anything I’m finding.

I’m very curious what you moms have found to be NECESSITIES for baby items. I keep seeing all these sponsored lists by bloggers for items to have in your baby registry, but it seems like SO MUCH CRAP and I prefer to be a frugal minimalist (especially since we could be moving right before/after the baby is born). I had a friend suggest getting the Dockatot, since it can be used as a bassinet, tummy time mat, or lounger.  And to just keep one of the pink bins from the hospital as a baby bath. I’m really interested in getting the Doona infant car-seat stroller that converts to a stroller in seconds. There is nothing I loathe more than carrying those bulky infant car seats around. They are so awkward and I am so weak! And I feel like if I have a stroller in the back of the car, I will just end up carrying it instead of pulling out the stroller because I’m lazy. So, those are the kinds of tips I would really love to know. If anybody has any suggestions, please send them my way!

I start a new job on Monday, which is really exciting, but also terrifying. I really need a job badly to make sure we can pay our rent, but I’ve been such a freaking bum for the past couple months. I don’t know how my body will react to working full time. I don’t even have the energy to sit full time most days. I’ll be working as a bookkeeper/development associate for a nonprofit organization that fights homelessness in Chicago. It’s actually exactly what I wanted—a job that will help me gain experience in the accounting skills that I’ve learned through my classwork. I’ve been a little worried about being in the accounting industry and the stereotypes that come with it. It would have been great to get an internship or a job at one of the large accounting firms, but I was worried I’d get sucked up into that world. Working for a nonprofit has always been my long-term goal, so I’m really excited.

I even told them I was pregnant in my interview, and they didn’t seem to mind. They are a pretty liberal organization, which I obviously identify with. Their whole philosophy is to give housing to homeless women and their children with no strings attached. There is no requirement to get clean and sober, no requirement to get a job, or to meet with a case manager. The do have to be accountable to landlords, so if they are doing anything illegal like dealing drugs out of the apartment, they can obviously still get evicted. They offer programs for the participants to use if they would like, but it’s not a requirement in order to live at the apartment complex. But they have found that it encourages them to do these things on their own time. And they have really great success rates of people who have turned their lives around and eventually go on to get more education and become home owners. Plus, they have determined that it costs about $17,000 per year to house one woman. The cost of running a homeless shelter for one woman is about $40,000 per year. And the cost of incarcerating one woman is about $70,000 per year. It’s something I can really get excited about!

The real miracle is that I still got the job even with my random blushing attacks. Has anyone else ever started blushing more when they are pregnant? It is so bad! I blushed at the most random time during my final interview! And I blushed after I gave a comment in Sunday School. And in my pregnancy class. And then I get actually embarrassed because I’m blushing over nothing, so I go an even deeper shade of red. I feel like I'm an awkward middle schooler again. It’s awful!

I know this is super long, but I have to tell one last story. I’m in a pregnancy support group since my doctor is worried about me since we have no family around here. Anyway, our first class was this week and we learned about nutrition. At the beginning of the class, we talked about making sure this is a safe place, so no making fun of anyone or attacking them or anything. Then, we all went around and told what we ate the day before. One of the husbands/boyfriends was there and he said that for lunch, he had his brother’s leftover cereal. As if it were a reflex, I yelled out “Gross!” and laughed. I’m such a dick! This poor guy probably hates my guts now and doesn’t feel safe at our support group! In my defense, there is nothing that makes me more nauseous than someone else’s cereal milk. My brother-in-law lets his dog drink his cereal milk after he’s done eating and it makes me dry heave, which I have said to his face multiple times. There is a place that actually sells milk flavored with cereal flavors, so it’s like the leftover milk after you eat cereal and I have no idea how they actually sell any of that. I know I’m probably weird, but that is the grossest thing I can think of. So, I embarrassed some dad-to-be and now he won’t want to go back to the class. I’m the worst. I also went and got Taco Bell after we learned about pregnancy nutrition, so I am the literal worst.